Dealing with loss is never easy but grief can feel enormous and ever consuming.
Crystals aren’t a magic wand that can take the pain away, but they can provide a soft source of comfort and healing vibrations to help guide you through this time.
The big themes of loss and grief are often dealt with in stages. It may sound cliché but time is a great healer and moving through the stages will take time and patience with oneself as you process all those emotions. Grief isn’t solely reserved for physical death, it can be a spiritual loss, an emotional loss, or even a change in circumstance can bring on a loss too. Remember its not a straight line through the grieving stages and tangled emotions rarely fit into neat packages nicely. Have courage, have patience, and remember to take a deep breath.
The Stages of Grief:
Stage 1: Denial
Even when expected, the initial stage of loss may be too overwhelming to process at first. Instead, we can move into denial, a common defense mechanism that helps keep us numb while we process things at our own pace.
Stage 2: Anger
Moving out of denial and those painful overwhelming feelings can emerge in the form of anger. This anger can be directed at the loss or anything in your path, it’s a big wild emotion and its part of the masking process.
Stage 3: Bargaining
Delicacy and helplessness can settle in during the bargaining stage and you start to pick over all the finer details and make ‘what if’ statements. You may try and remain locked into the past, forcing a different outcome, and imagining all the things that could be different.
Stage 4: Depression
As we shift into the present space, that flood of feeling can leave us feeling drained and empty or completely bewildered and confused. You may shut down completely and question what your life will look like now.
Stage 5: Acceptance
Acceptance isn’t always the end point of this difficult and sometimes life-defining journey. You may sidestep back and forth into the other stages even when you have accepted the loss in your life. Acceptance isn’t always a happy ending either. But it can be a little light at the end of a dark tunnel. It means that you are in the process of processing and that there is hope or a path forward.
Crystals can help rewire your energetic field so that the perception of the loss isn’t as severe as expected to be. Where you previously saw no end may now look more like a dark tunnel with a dim light glowing far in the distance. That light will get closer and more attainable, with time.
Big energy and bright shades of joy have a time and place but for many dealing with layers of grief will need crystal energy that brings gentle healing, evens out those massive emotions, and makes you feel comforted and cared for.
Crystals suggested for grieving
Amazonite -
Grief takes a major toll on the heart chakra, often causing it to become closed or significantly weakened.
Crystals that work closely with the heart are great stones for grief as they try to bring in a sense of normality and regulated function. Amazonite can be placed directly onto your heart, or forehead, while you meditate lying down.
When you sit up from this session, you may feel the overwhelming urge to sob, or purge out your emotions one way or another. Crying, panic attacks or difficulty breathing are to be expected, and the user is encouraged to allow this energy to be released in whatever way it seeks to. From here, healing is underway.
Keep this stone next to your bed while you sleep. It will work with your subconscious mind during your slumber and help heal aspects of your mental and physical being that you didn’t even know were impacted by your recent trauma.
Amethyst - Amethyst is a natural tranquilizer that can quiet the mind, soothe the body, and soften the soul. For those moments when you feel completely overwhelmed or lost in the forest of feeling, this stone can bring you back to your core and hold you there. Amethyst is all emotional comfort especially when the feelings are too big to bear. It quietens anger, decreases rage, takes the edge off of any anxiety, and can also help you sleep at night.
Carnelian - Comforting and warm, carnelian is a flame that can chase away the demons. This stone is exceptionally talented at helping to balance energy and also fills us with feelings of being supported, safe, and strong enough to carry the weight.
Clear Quartz - First, it amplifies any other stone around it. You can use Clear Quartz to make the rest of your crystals for grief even more powerful.
Aside from that, Clear Quartz acts as a “master healer” working to fix whatever it needs to. If you feel lost and unsure what healing crystals to use, start with Clear Quartz. Clear Quartz will align and unblock all your chakras so you feel balanced and at ease during times of grief.
Green Aventurine - Green Aventurines are Heart chakra stones, they also make excellent stones for grief. They work on your Heart chakra while comforting and protecting you. They also encourage perseverance, and when you’re going through a challenging time and grieving, perseverance is something you’ll need, Other properties of Green Aventurine include the ability to improve your well-being and create calming energy around you.
Kunzite - When you need more love in your life, turn to Kunzite.
Kunzites make wonderful crystals for grief as they help you heal from a broken heart. Kunzite is the Stone of Emotion. If you harbor negative feelings, Kunzie will open your mind and heart, allowing the two to connect and heal together.
Kunzite provides calming energy to help you heal emotionally. In particular, those who have undergone trauma (of any kind) will find Kunzite useful for emotional healing.
Lepidolite - For those feeling like they are constantly kicking underwater, Lepidolite can give you rest thanks to its calming influence. Lepidolite invites you gently to do the work you need to do when moving through grief. It invites you to release trauma and suffering and to move towards a place of deeper healing on this long and complicated journey.
Moonstone - A stone that provides light in the darkness, moonstone is an amazing stone to have close by when moving through the stages of grief. Moonstone is a solid reminder that emotions and time and the tides that pull can all work in cycles. It is also a stone of new beginnings which is sometimes the light we need to shift us out of a darker spell.
Pyrite - Keeping adrenal exhaustion at bay is important during the grief process. As all those heavy emotions are stirred up, it's very easy for overwhelm to settle in, and this can lead to heightened anxiety which in turn could lead to adrenal burnout. Having the fiery energy of Pyrite close by can help. This nugget of fools gold can absorb excess energy and can connect with your solar plexus to bring balance and respite which lead to emotional healing.
Rhodonite - Rich in self-love and excellent at helping you to heal old wounds. It doesn’t just patch up the pain but instead guides you through the journey of clearing the heart and activating the love you need to get through this. In time, rhodonite helps you to let go of the emotions that are no longer serving you and to move to a place of gentle acceptance.
Rose Quartz - A truly loving stone with high vibrations. Rose Quartz helps build up your feelings of compassion and calm. There is something reassuring about having Rose Quartz close by when moving through the stages of grief. It is one of the best stones when all those feelings of guilt and self-blame can flood your soul. Here, Rose Quartz softly reminds you to be kind to yourself.
Smokey Quartz - Smokey quartz comes with strong grounding properties and can help you to feel rooted and stable even when your emotions are aiming to knock you off your feet. It can be a comfort to know that this can be an anchor and help you to process your feelings. From the initial anger that arises to the deep breath of acceptance, smokey quartz brings its intuition and promotes healthy action throughout the journey. Smokey Quartz is also a good depression aid as it helps shift negative energy into positive.
Sunstone - We perceive grief as a sort of darkness, so any energy affiliated with the sun is the direct opposite and thus a bringer of change.
Sunstone is a positive, energetic stone that doesn’t tolerate complacency or ruminating. This is vital in times of grief, because if we allow ourselves to ruminate on what is happening we will begin to spiral even lower.
When you just want to feel stronger, sunstone can give you that boost and sense of invincibility. Of course, when met with grief, this sense can be partially pacified and will feel more like a sense of hopefulness, which is also a great step up from where you were before!